Strength That's Beautiful

When things go wrong, as they sometimes will
When the road you're trudging seems all uphill
When the funds are low and the debts are high
And you want to smile but have to sigh
When pain is pressing you down a bit--
Rest if you must, but do not quit.
Success is failure turned inside out
The silver tint of the clouds of doubt
And you can never tell how close you are
It may be near when it seems so far
So stick to the fight when you're hardest hit
It's when things go wrong that you must not quit.

I can't say how many times in my life that people have told me that I'm strong. Strong of heart. Strong of spirit. It has amazed me that in so many tragic or difficult circumstances, just how much strength arises in me. For so long in my life, I believed my strength to be a curse. I hated it. I hated feeling like I had to be strong all the time. I hated when people told me how strong I was. So many times, all I wanted was to just be able to be weak. Just once. Just once, let someone else be strong. Please, let me be weak. But it was almost like I didn't have a choice. Strength just rose up out of me, sometimes without my knowledge of its presence. I don't know exactly when I stopped believing the lie that being strong was a curse. But I did. And I started seeing new truths.
First of all, I realized that it was never my own strength that kept me going. Every second of it came straight from the heart of my Father in Heaven. I was only ever strong because He made me so. But I also know that I always had a choice. I had a choice to either give in to whatever the circumstance offered me, which was usually to give up and quit, or to rise above it. Of course, there have been things that I've quit in my life. But for the most part, in the most important and desperate times, I refused to quit. It wasn't an option to me. While going through hard times, I never felt strong. And I never understood how people thought I was. I would think to myself, "They're out of their minds! I'm not strong. I'm not courageous. I'm a fearful mess!" But in hindsight, God has blown my mind, showing me my ability to endure and withstand. And after every trial and circumstance, I was always even stronger and better for it. In life, there are things that we cannot stop. And we always have a choice to give up or stand up.
Being Christmas, we've all heard the story of the birth of Jesus many, many times in the last month. But it means so much more to me than I think it ever has. Don't get me wrong; it's always meant everything to me. But just with everything that the Lord has been doing in my life, I feel differently about it.

I think of Mary.
Little Mary. Theologians say that she was only 15 or 16 years old. Here she is, about to be married and start this new life, when God invades her world like nothing she's ever experienced. An angel appears to her and tells her that she has been chosen to carry God's Son, the Son of the living God! I can imagine the fear and doubt that rose up inside this young teenage girl. The questions. But she didn't give heed to any of them. She believes and says, "Let it be done to me as you have said. I am the Lord's servant." I wonder...did she have any idea what she was getting herself into? She had to face the world as a young girl, pregnant before marriage. How people must have talked about her! How they must have rejected her and slammed her! She had to face the accusations against her and the lies spoken about her. I'm sure she wanted to defend herself to these people that thought they knew it all, thought they knew the real story and truth. She knew the truth. But she didn't give up.And through it all, I can imagine her doubting herself many times: Why me, Lord? Surely there had to have been someone better for this? Older? Wiser? Stronger? But God had made His choice, and she had made hers. She could have said no. We all have freewill. But she didn't. She let strength rise up inside her and she chose to accept everything that came with her choice. And now we know her as one of the strongest women of all time. Her strength was breathtaking.
I see more clearly than ever that this gift of strength that my Lord has given me is beautiful and purposeful. I love this strength. I'm so thankful that I can be strong. I am strong. Because He is in me. I can face lies and accusations and gossips and slanderers and trials and circumstances and battles and fears because I am strong. I choose to let His strength rise up in me. It's going to take me places. It's going to change my life. From glory to glory, from victory to victory. It's going to change others lives. It's going to bring Kingdom.
Abba, whatever I am to face, I choose to say, "I am Your servant. Let it be done to me as You will." I will not quit. I will not fear. I will not hide. I know there's always rest. But I will never quit. Your strength is mine. Thank You for all that You're doing and for the adventure that we're on. You know how I love adventure. :)

¹ Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High
   will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.
² I will say of the LORD, “He is my refuge and my fortress,
   my God, in whom I trust.”

 ³ Surely he will save you
   from the fowler’s snare
   and from the deadly pestilence.
⁴ He will cover you with his feathers,
   and under his wings you will find refuge;
   his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart.
⁵ You will not fear the terror of night,
   nor the arrow that flies by day,
⁶ nor the pestilence that stalks in the darkness,
   nor the plague that destroys at midday.
⁷ A thousand may fall at your side,
   ten thousand at your right hand,
   but it will not come near you.
⁸ You will only observe with your eyes
   and see the punishment of the wicked.

 ⁹ If you say, “The LORD is my refuge,”
   and you make the Most High your dwelling,
¹⁰ no harm will overtake you,
   no disaster will come near your tent.
¹¹ For he will command his angels concerning you
   to guard you in all your ways;
¹² they will lift you up in their hands,
   so that you will not strike your foot against a stone.
¹³ You will tread on the lion and the cobra;
   you will trample the great lion and the serpent.

 ¹⁴ “Because he loves me,” says the LORD, “I will rescue him;
   I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name.
¹⁵ He will call on me, and I will answer him;
   I will be with him in trouble,
   I will deliver him and honor him.
¹⁶ With long life I will satisfy him
   and show him my salvation.”

~Psalm 91~

 The Best Is Yet To Come...